Snot: A Love Story
by Midnight On Saturn
Summary: love can be a funny thing
1. chapter 1

Jimmy B stood at the corner of division Ave and pine, waiting for his girl Sally G.

Jimmy wait, nervous and agitated, wiping his nose and flinging snot on the curb, it was clear and not that noticeable, but sometimes he would get big Green bastards and just wipe em on the wall or wherever he could, and even sometimes on his Levi's. It was a disgusting site, he did it constantly it was like a habit or something.

Sally G finally met up with the Jim-miester and plants a big warm kiss on his snot crusted face, slipping her red hot tongue sensually down his flem-hole.

"Hey baby, miss me?" Sally said as she nuzzled her ruby lips onto Jim-boy's varsity jacket collar (oh what a jock that Jimmy was, no other nuts could fill his cup), covered in ages of dried mucous.

Jimmy's heart was a flutter, here was the gal of his dreams that didn't mind what a snot flinging mother-fucker he was, she really dug him snot-rockets and all, thay were a couple of slick bitches made fore each other.

"Always babe, been thinking bout you all day... it's been hell I tell ya... ya know?" Jimmy B said 'awe-shuckin' his head, hocking a big loogy onto the curb, then wiping his nose free of some more snot and discreetly rubbing his fingers through his thick dirty blond locks.

"Hey, wanna grab a bite from burger Bros, then head over to the park and see what happens? Maybe find a way to pass the time, if you catch my drift." Sally said right before she grabbed his strong athletic hand and nibbled on his index finger coated in dried snot.

"Sure, no prob." Jimmy said as hacked up some more flem and like a gentleman, spat it to the side out of sight from his adoring lass.

The two love sick kids grabbed some chilli-dogs and a Mocha Frappuccino to share, headed off to the lakefront to chill and make some time, all the while Jimmy flinging more snot and hacking more flem, but now he had a few pieces of toilet paper he snagged from the Burger Bros mens room.

The lakefront was a special place for Jimmy; sometimes he'd watch the fairies hog down on each other's Johnson's for hours on end. 'Boy can those fruits swallow some meat-log I tell ya... bet no other gal could hog on a log like a good ol' fairy.'


	2. Swans

"You know babe I don't think my old man wants me to get hooked on you... like your too low class or somethin' I try to tell him 'look pops Sally's gunna be my lady weather you like it or not... remember how paps was when you hitched moms? Ol' paps thought youz was crazy, but look at ya now, still chained to the 'old girl' after all this time.' So you see Sally? it's like destiny or kizmit or something the universe can't explain."

"Don't you worry Jimmy, whats gunna happen will, and well... if your old man don't think I'm good enough for his baby boy... well he can stick it up his tired old ass. And I'm trying to be a lady here, so you get my drift."

"I know baby doll... how bout you give me a swig of that Mocha Frapp and give me some sugar?" Jimmy said as he hacked off a soft bead of flem onto his dirty sneaker, took a swig then headed off towards the dock to watch those pretty swans.

"They're so beautiful Jimmy, they float like angels on the water; have you ever seen something so gorgeous Jimmy ?" Sally said, not noticing Jimmy digging a hard rock of crud out of his nose mixed with dried blood and flicking it into the beautiful rippling water of the lake.

"Yeah, like God blessed angels I tell ya... some things in this world just so damn beautiful, it overwhelms you sometimes. Hey baby-doll it's funny how we're just one little grain of sand amongst the stars, dark matter and white holes and such, it's so damn beautiful and scary I tell ya Sally damn scary I tell ya."

"Hey Jimmy, wanna head over to them bushes for some alone time those poetic words just made my heart skip a beat, and I just rediscovered why I love you so fricken much." Sally said, pulling Jimmy into the bushes by the park restrooms for some adult type festivities. (All classy of coarse. )

"Oh Sally girl, I don't wanna get caught... but you sure know how to put this man's cosmic chaos into perspective." Jimmy said while taking a bite of his chilli-dog, shooting a snot-rocket Into the box maples. (chilli falling into a place I'd rather not say, but making the moment oh so right.)

"Watch it honey, don't want me to 'lose control' it might not turn out so good wiggle worm calm down and relax a bit." Sally said staring at him from an odd position.

"Babe your the best... honest, first thing I'm gunna do is tell pops we're in this for life, yeah thats what I'm gunna do honey-pie. You're awesome baby-doll a true keeper that's right." Jimmy said as he hocked a big wad of flem over the guardrail and into the murky lake littered with this and that, causing a ripple, kinda beautiful like a butterfly flapping it's wings in Japan or something that type of thing... well at least that's how Jimmy thought of it.

"You alright Jimmy, wanna go home or sit and talk about these major things? I know of one 'major thing' Jimmy that won't be needing taking care of." Sally said with a grin, holding on to the front of Jimmy's stained white shirt as she straightened up his belt buckle.

"Sure we can watch them swans and stuff, and then walking ourselves into the future." Jimmy said hacking one more bit of mucous into some toilet tissue and leaving it by the beautiful box maples.

"Jimmy boy, ain't it pretty? look at it all and believe it can all be ours together beautiful huh Jimmy, I guess we both like drifting off into daydreamville huh?"

"Yeah babe, you and I are just a couple of daydreaming fools... but some of the dreams are about to come true." Jimmy said as he wiped some snot onto the side of his faded blue jeans, and gazed off into the civil twilight with his soon to be one and only.

The end


End file.
